A Rat at Texas Furry Siesta! 2024 — The Artwork of Brother Rat

We left early friday morning for the train station, we decided to take the train instead of driving to the con for a few reasons: One, it's better for the environment and two, fuck driving through Dallas.....Fuck it.

We weren't delayed as much as the year prior. The train ride up was peaceful, passing through small towns and weaving in and out of deep pine forest patches. The light was odly golden coming in through the small train windows of our room, and as Emma Ruth Rundle gently played over my headphones, as the shadows of trees flicked in and out and the train rocked steadily on, I began to doze off.
Waking up to a knock on the door as one of the train attendants asked if we wanted breakfast and informed us he'd made coffee, I took the opportunity to stretch my legs and make a cup.
The feeling, as I sat there across from my husband, sipping my coffee after my nap, was one of peace and much needed rest.
The year has been a difficult one to say the least. Planning a trip to Europe that took all of our PTO, money and energy, dealing with difficult changes and challenges at our jobs, moving out of a damaged and constantly flooding apartment, odd illnesses and health issues landing me in the ER twice the second of which revealed a serious diagnosis that suddenly activated quite a lot of severe life changes for us. We suddenly had to adopt extreme low sodium dieting, less sugar, less fat and oil, which meant our normal hang outs and date nights were toast, it was cooking at home and eating things like raw fruits and veggies from then on. we had begun exercising on a regular basis, which as anyone who has to do it will tell you is difficult starting from scratch while trying to work a 9-5 full time and keeping hobbies going. taking blood pressure twice a day and tracking everything I ate with an app. doctors apt, meds, and lots and lots of panic attacks. I went from 230 lbs to 173 lbs, went from a casual drinker to no alcohol except on special occasions i.e. in three months I'd probably have about 30 beers and a few glasses of wine here there, in the last three months I've had 3 tiny glasses of wine. One at my sister's proposal, one at my first gay bar and one at a celebratory dinner with friends. from the night of the diagnosis I spit out my nicotine gum I was chewing and have had nothing nicotine related since that day. Quitting cold turkey left me in cold sweats on the bathroom floor. telling my husband and my family about my diagnosis was difficult and scary, we just had no idea what it meant at the time. We have a better idea now and have made tons of progress, but to say it isn't heavily weighing on me would be a lie. I was tired, it felt like the trip, the move and the diagnosis were all catching up with me on that train. but it wasn't fear I was consumed with for once, it felt more acceptance and the beginning of knowledge and release. Like I said, it felt strangely peaceful and with so much panic and cold fear in my life leading up to that point, it felt like the light flitting in through the dirty train windows was healing. The coffee was healing, and where I was going, was going to be healing.

We arrived in Dallas outside the Hyatt Regency at about 12:00 in the afternoon, exited the train and immediately went into the underground where the hotel the con is held at has a door you can be buzzed into from.

I was excited to be back, I really only get to see furries other than my own reflection and my husband once a year, and this was that time. The first sign that we had arrived in the right place was the icy air that hit us as we were buzzed in from the underground and then suddenly passing folks in pup hoods, the excitement built.
As we checked in, the first fursuits were seen as suiters milled about the lobby, and I sighed, it literally felt like relief, just to be there, to have made it to this place and to be among my people....animals.
A quick elevator trip up and we found our room had a great view of the city and was in a nice little corner of the floor where you could overlook the railing and see down all the way to the lounge/bar below on the second floor.
We unpacked and rested for a bit. Rolling straight out of a full work week, cramming all our days off together to make the trip work had left us exhausted, happy, but exhausted.
After freshening up a bit, we headed back down and to registration. It was quick and the folks were friendly as always, it's always exciting to see my "BrotherRat" moniker printed on a new tag, the ones this year were very nice looking.
With badges clipped to our shirt we headed to do our first peek into Dealers Den, we knew we werent going to be attending or getting up to much on friday evening, so we grabbed a comic each ( I picked up Orens Forge vol.1) and a few snacks from "Delicious Doom" and "Wolfe Sweet Treats."
After scurrying off with our goody bags, we quickly checked in on the game room and then headed back up to the room where we relaxed for a bit and napped.
By the late evening the itch to get suited up was becoming too much so I transformed myself into my rat self and headed back down. Being Ben is magic, it's hard to explain, but being him is a freedom not easy to come by in daily life. Walking about as my rat self in a huge space with so many others who are out and about as THEIR animal selves is so intensely special and as tired as I was, I could feel that specialness deeply. We walked back down to the dealer's den and bought a little fan to put in my tiny rat mouth to help keep me cool and then headed next door to play Galaga and pinball in the game room.
We took some photos with a little stuffed alligator that was set up in a photo shoot booth and then headed back upstairs to change and get ready for dinner.
Eating on a sodium restricted diet while on a trip is challenging. We brought food and snacks just in case there were no options for me, but you WANT to eat at the restaurants! It's part of a trip! Though that isn't always possible and that is OK, the Hyatt Regency in Dallas came through in spades. We ended up at a second floor restaurant where they were able to cook me a plain piece of salmon on a fresh salad with sodium free dressing. It was awesome to get to sit there and eat and not have to worry over how much sodium was in a dish and how much of it I could eat. The staff was so sweet and I can't thank them enough for making that a possibility for me.
After dinner we ended the night and slept in the next day, exhausted is a mild word, this felt like European jet lag again that night.
The next day started with a breakfast of fresh fruits and a bit of yogurt and then back to the dealer's den to make our yearly book shopping pilgrimage, support the artists and makers and see what all was new. Then it was back into suit and going to rat about in the game room, where we met up with a few new friends, chatted for a bit and then I continued to "rat" after we parted.
The con ends twice for me. The first time is when I know I'm taking my suit off for the last time while there. Before we headed to the room to do that, I let it all wash over me as we walked about the hotel. Just being there, among so many people who had come together for similar reasons, the love of this fandom, the love of anthropomorphic animals. A queer positive space where I could be an openly gay man, where I could hold my husband's hand and not be afraid. Where diversity is celebrated. The LGBTQA visibility at TFS is always healing, this part of the country can be tough on our community and getting to see so many people get to be themselves and be out and proud and not worried....it's an energy I can't take for granted. It humbles and fills me every single time. On top of all these feelings, I'm walking around in it all in a hot, impossible to see out of giant rat! It's a wild experience, I consider myself fairly transparent and open in my life but when the burdens really come off, you realize just how much you carry on you without even fully recognizing it and with the year having gone the way it had, my emotions were running high, I will always say "thank god for fursuit heads, they are easy to cry in"
The year felt like it was there with me, there with everyone, it walked with us in the space, it didn't vanish, it didn't become "easier from that point forward' but it felt like there were more shoulders than just mine that it was resting on and it gave me some much needed time to breathe...to rest.....to heal. That is what I come to my community for, even if it's just a few words spoken between us here and there, the spirit is there and it always leaves me feeling empowered, braver and highly inspired. We made it back up to the room and I took Ben off.... and I thanked him, he's become such a source of joy for me, it felt right to literally tell him "thank you".
After spraying suits down and drying things up, packing things and prepping for the next day's train ride, we headed back down for our last dinner of the con, another stellar hit with low sodium options and kind, super wait staff. We sat there and ate while a pre-season Seahawks game played quietly on our table. We sat there in our favorite restaurant spot and talked for a bit, talked about the year and new friends, future plans and letting go, we felt older for sure, maybe a little fragile, but hopeful and happy, it felt like a much needed piece of us both had been replenished. We finished our little dessert we split.... and then we got in line for the DRAG SHOW!!!
Now listen, I haven't been to many, but I love drag and I love drag shows. I'd never been to one at a furry convention and was highly curious what kind of event "Otterly Fierce Productions" was going to put on.
As soon as the company has uploaded the video of the performance to their Youtube, I will be adding a link to it here. -->
All I can say until that video is available, is that I SHREDDED my voice screaming for those performers! It was one of the most entertaining shows I've ever seen. The audience was highly engaged, the energy was so good and the numbers were WILD. The MC was absolutely stunning and had great delivery and humor. The opening act hit like a sledgehammer with energy, humor and wit. There were wonderfully furry themed numbers and ensambles, it was a wonderful experience and I was absolutely floored by it.
We headed to bed after the show completely hyped and happy but EXHAUSTED.
The last morning was check out, getting our bags together and heading downstairs for breakfast and to wait for the train departure time. That morning Dittman Rat had informed me that one of my favorite bands Starflyer59, had released a new album, I downloaded it while we packed and was eager to listen to it on our train ride home as it felt like it would be very fitting train ride music.
Passing the time was easy, we did another round of looks in the dealers den where I found a wonderful little badger plush I had somehow missed. We ended up back in the game room until closing was called and then hung out outside the escape room where artists sat around big tables swapping sketches until it was time to head to the train platform. That walk is always hard, I swear there's little ratty claw marks leading from the hotel exit to the train platform! I didn't wanna leave! But leave we did and on time. As we sat there completely exhausted again, as my husband dozed, I put on my headphones and let Starflyer59's "Lust for Gold" begin to play. There may not be a more perfect album to soundtrack the train ride out of that con back to our sleepy town. It was perfect. A slight bittersweet sound, but warm, experienced and slow, it was the sound of moving forward, like a train, like my life. I was leaving, but I was taking a lot back with me, I was coming back more healed, with more fuel to burn, more inspired, feeling more love and with more of a fire to defend and show love and support to others in my community.
Texas Furry Siesta was a blast, and it always is. I cannot thank the Staff/ volunteers and performers, vendors and hotel staff enough for their collaborative work to bring an experience like that to life, to give us a space to feel those things and be ourselves in a safe, creative and beautiful way.
Much love to you all ~Ben/ brotherrat

(Here's a few links to things mentioned above! It should be noted that these are not direct endorsements, as I have not done any sort of research into any of the following businesses/ individuals but enjoyed some tasty treats or performance/ product by them at the Convention!)